My 12-step program

My 12 step program only has one step. Start hating. I can quit anything or anyone by making myself hate it/them. This is how I quit cigarettes. This is how I quit bad boys. This is how I move on.

Only, I hate hating. There is no room in my heart for hate.

i once read a little blurb about lent and about how maybe people should focus on picking up good habits for 40 days instead of dropping bad ones. Lent is supposed to be a time to deny ourselves pleasure--but instead, why not focus on making ourselves better? not that i celebrate lent.

I think i am going to change my 12-step program. I cannot hate the things I do not want in my life. i just don't want to live that way. But I am going to focus on filling my life with the things I feel mesh with me life energy. And stop trying to force myself into giving people the benefit of the doubt or one more chance. I am done. I want things to be copacetic. I need to cultivate positive energy. I cannot fight my buddha nature, and it is not negative. or even overly-dramatic.